With Father’s Day coming around we are sure to see loads of fathers proudly displaying their children on social media posts. Little boys dressed like dad while the father smiles with pride or little girls with smiles beaming from ear to ear as they pose for a picture with the first man they ever loved. Just as with Mother’s Day, Father’s Day is probably the most well-meaning holiday you’re gonna find in America. Parenting is a special thing that only others who have reared a child can appreciate. I know love and all its variations. Love IS love, but no love compares to the love a parent has for its child or a child to a parent. While professing our love and adoration for parenting or our parents is quite normal, there has been an increasing amount of mothers who have claimed Father’s Day for themselves. No they aren’t post-op transsexuals, rather they are normal women with all the normal parts. The only thing that’s not normal is that they’re claiming fatherhood.
For a period of time during my teens, my mother was a single mother. I witnessed her toil, sacrifice, and tired eyes as she proved for five children many times over. I respect her for it while, of course, being highly grateful yet the fact still stands; she wasn’t my father. A mother CAN single-handedly raise a basketball team, which would definitely be a great feat, but she can never be a father.
Human biology and the reality of the anatomy aside, I find it problematic that the womb which bore civilization thinks that after a certain level of mothering she reaches a plateau of fathering. To me, this discounts the role of a mother while placing her below the father and this is wrong. Thinking on the old Middle Eastern adage, “Heaven lies at the feet of the mother”, I wonder if the women who are so adamant to claim Father’s Day understand they’re actually tarnishing the honor that is motherhood. Of course they don’t, but I hope one day they will because anyone can teach a boy how to shoot a basketball or defend himself but only a mother can give birth then feed her young from her own body. As a man, I find that astonishing and yes I am jealous. No matter what I accomplish in this world, I will never be able to feel a child growing inside of me. And it doesn’t matter how gentle I hold my infant, if doesn’t feel the softness and warmth of the mother’s breasts, the baby will cry.
Mothering is THE diamond standard of parenting. I hate that I live in a society where the house mom is frowned on and it seems the status of the mother is grossly misunderstood. I also hate that the little recognition I receive as the secondary parent is being stolen by the parent who began parenting shortly after pregnancy while I had to wait until the child’s birth in order to fully comprehend the reality of being a parent. Parents should be honored everyday and the mother is to be honored far more than the father. No one is stealing the well-deserved shine of being a mother, so please don’t take the little light left for the fathers.
A Proud Momma’s Boy & A Dutiful Father